So Ive been thinking about making one of these blogs for a while. I thought it would be fun to share my thoughts, tell funny dating stories, address comments made, questions asked etc. Well, today I received an email that was just the motivation I need.
A Citizen on Biggercity by the name of "superstevies" (look him up, he seems like a real peach lol) decided to send me the following message:
"So yeah...if your not really a chaser or NOT JUST a chaser why does it say your looking for a chub. I know its none of my business who you are looking for but if your not a chaser why r u on this site and not on the 100 other sites you could be on. We do not have a lot of choices about sites to go to, to acutally get any interest and you have to take up space. Every picture you have is of a super skinny twink circut looking person. How about some real life. You with a person that could be even with 1% body fat.???? It just seems like your really on here to get your ego stroked by guys swooning over how great looking you are. It seems your into acting and seems like your good at it, acting like your into guys that are not skinny? So yeah we do think this about you and you have done nothing to prove any of this wrong."
First of all let me state that most of the gentleman who have sent me messages on BC have been very flattering, encouraging, courteous and above all, respectful.
One of my hesitations in "coming out" as a chaser, something which i have been criticized for not doing for so long was that the chub chaser community seems very passive aggressive and judgemental. As a "chaser" its just assumed that I am only interested in a chub because of his size, or looks, and that Im not capable of having a genuine interest in the person. I couldnt possibly see a larger man as anything but a sexual fetish. I find it almost comical that a community so marginalized because of their appearance, are so quick to judge someone else because of his.
You are correct "superstevie" when you point out that I am a chaser but not just a chaser. I am attracted to many different types of men, including chubs. Criticizing someone for whom he is drawn to is just like criticizing someone for being homosexual. You can't help what you are or are not attracted to.
I guess my frustration with this posting, and the reason I felt compelled to post a general response is the hope that whoever reads this will see someone who is genuine, honest and just trying to find someone out there to share his life and his heart as well as his bed. Perhaps we will be a little more hesitant when judging from now on.
"I'd rather be 9 people's favorite thing, than 100 people's 9th favorite thing. "~Title of Show